


Soul Bound

by janai



Series: Meta-Crisis Victorious: Every Great Journey has Its Start [4]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Anger, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Loss of Control, Shame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:35:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27088723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/janai/pseuds/janai
Summary: He thought, she thought as the realization of what just happened between them....
Relationships: Bonnie Mae - Relationship, Metacrisis Tenth Doctor & Rose Tyler
Series: Meta-Crisis Victorious: Every Great Journey has Its Start [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1973086
Comments: 8
Kudos: 6





	1. The Agony...

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry, no pictures....could not find any that suited this part of the story....  
> I decided not to have their accents and speech pattens in this one.

The Doctor was curled up on the ground crying his eyes and soul out. Emotions swirled through him like a tornado as his mind frantically tried to make sense of what just happened. Everything hurt within him; body, soul, emotions and brain. He thought that he might lose his mind for being so overwhelmed on so many fronts.

Anger flared in his heart and mind like acid on an open wound. _The bitch lied to me! All this talk about love and forever and death do up part! Threatened to take my daughter from me, did she? She will regret if she does....I will tear apart this world to find them and make her pay!!!_

Shame washed through him like a sick wave of foul water. _She was angry, she was mad that I wanted to leave her behind! How many times have I done thinking to protect her. How can I even doubt her love for me, our child? How can I ever face her now?_

Loss slid into his heart like a blade of ice. _She broke our bonds...she....no.... she didn't break them. The wolf deprived me of the connections.....oh hell, the agony of the loss of her in me! I know now I could never outlive her, I don't care what promises I made long ago._

Realization quenched all as he slowly sat up, wiping the tears from his face. _She is my lifemate, my soul, my second heart, my anchor...can she help me to fight this? The wolf would be an ally, her love and strength is without question. Maybe she is right...._

_~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~_

Rose had stumbled into the shower and had turned on the cold water; it blasted her into reality and sent the wolf back to its small den in her soul. She gradually added hot water to bring it to a warmer temperature then allowed the spray to hit her face.

She felt righteous anger towards this version of her beloved Time Lord. _How dare he try to leave me behind! How many times has he done that and shattered my heart and soul?! He keeps doing it to me and broke his promise that he would never leave me again. Bastard!_

A wave of shame caused her heart to ache in a way that she never hoped to feel again. _I threatened to take our child and run away, hide from him forever! The father of my child, my second heart...why did I say that, how can I ever forgive myself for saying it. How can I face him again?_

Loss coated the shame with a veneer of tainted slime. _Oh God, his face when I told him that, when I hid the bond! Why was I so cruel to him?! The agony he felt when the bond disappeared, it will haunt me forever._

Realization: _He was only thinking of our safety, me and Bonnie. He is afraid he will hurt us or worse. Why did I not see that before...he loves us beyond death, I know this...why was I so selfish? Maybe he is right....._

_To be continued in Part 2...._


	2. ...The Talk....

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor and Rose talk it out. A vision shocks both....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I decided to make this 3 chapters. My dad is in hospital and it has been difficult to write. He is, right now, doing better so I hope to write chapter 3 and release it soon.  
> This story was edited on my phone at hospital so I expect there will be format issues.

R

Rose was physically refreshed by the shower yet her mind was roaming in unhappy little circles. She could barely feel the Doctor through their bond and knew he was trying to shield his emotions. It was mostly successful except for the little trickle of remorse and fear. This was the worst blow-out they had ever in their lives and she wondered how they would survive as a couple through the Doctors changes. If only they could go back and change the time lines but she knew they couldn't. They would have to continue forwards and she desperately hoped that they would still be together after this was over. 

Leaving the ensuite, she went to her dresser and pulled the drawer open which held her t-shirts; what to wear, what to wear. Then she spotted it, a pale blue tank top emblazoned with a smattering of tiny red and pink hearts. The Doctor gave it to her for her birthday so that she could wear 'all his hearts of love' across her own. That her Doctor was such a romantic once again made her glad that she had snogged him that day and let the Time Lord go. She pulled the garment over her head and smoothed the soft material over her her torso. She hoped he would notice her choice of clothing and knew it was time to face her husband; it was time to talk and, hopefully, make up. 

She knew where he was from their bond and followed the sad little tune to the nursery. The sight that met her eyes brought fresh tears to her already red eyes. The Doctor was sitting in the nursing lounger holding Bonnie close; her little face was nestled against his neck and he was resting his left cheek on top of her downy head. She saw his nostrils flaring and knew that he was deeply breathing in their daughters unique scent. His eyes were closed but his face was very pale and dark smudges rested under his eyes. His normally wild and buoyant hair was damp and his fringe clung to his forehead. That he had showered and not fussed his hair into a riot of spiky messiness, spoke volumes for his state of mind. Rose knew that she had stabbed his heart and soul when she had screamed her ultimatum at him earlier. 

The Doctor continued to cuddle little Bonnie; Rose knew that he had sensed her presence and waited quietly until he acknowledged her arrival. Silence reigned supreme in the small room as each tried to summon the courage to speak. Several minutes later, it was the soft, hoarse voice of the Doctor which ended that oppressive silence.

"Would...," his voice was trembling as he spoke, " …would you really run away and take,...take Bonnie with you?" His eyes remained closed and a tiny crinkle appeared in the skin between his brows.

Rose closed her eyes as her heart clenched in her chest. His voice was so weak, so sad that it cut through their bond like a hot knife through butter. She was almost tempted to flee with the shame and hurt that she felt for causing him the pain. She knew she could never take the words back and feared that he might never trust her again. However, he had also thrown a knife into her gut with his angry thoughts at the time.

"Would you really have tracked us down if we ran and made me pay?" There was no anger in her tone, no accusation or condemnation, just a wistfulness that pieced his racing heart; she had heard and he cringed. How could she ever trust him again? 

The Doctor felt their mutual wave of shame and remorse and finally stood up to gently place their daughter into her crib. He leaned down to kiss her tiny nose before standing up to look at his wife; without a word he reached his hand up to waggle his fingers at her. Rose shuddered once before reaching out to take it. It was a hopefully sign that gave a small modicum of relief to their battered souls.

"Wait," she murmured as she walked over to the crib holding their daughter. Like the Doctor, she leaned down and placed a gentle kiss upon their babies very adorable button nose. When she stood up, the Doctor gently tugged their conjoined hands and she followed him out of the nursery and down the hallway to their bedroom. Once inside, he stopped and turned to her with a look of shame and regret in his eyes. 

"No." he whispered, still holding onto her hand. "You?" 

"Same," she murmured and they carefully embraced, too nervous to hold on tight and yet desperate with the need to touch. Rose gently pushed away from him and took a deep breath before she spoke again. 

"Doctor, I love ya more than I thought possible to love a man. But we cannot keep goin' on like this. We can't war like this, not with wots 'appening with you. I don't know why we are doin this, hurtin' each other like this." She searched his face and saw understanding there. "We have ta be strong for the other, not allow this to tear us apart." The Doctor ran both hands over his face and through his hair before looking at her with understanding and compassion. 

"I don't know why either...we shouldn't be, we both know that." He paused then gazed up at the ceiling, eyebrow quirked upwards. "'Course, we are a couple of stubborn fools, but....I hate this, the changes, the anger. Its just not me...or you...or us."

"Wha' can we do?" Her expression was anxious and she started nibbling on a thumb nail. The Doctor placed his hands on her shoulders and looked into her eyes. 

"Rose, there is only truth in the bond," he whispered as he reached up with both hands to gently touch her temple. "Perhaps, perhaps we should look." 

He almost thought she would refuse when her eyes widened and a look of apprehension shadowed her expression. Is she afraid of what I've become? Then, to his relief, she nodded one and reached up to touch his temples with slightly trembling hands. Together, they slipped into each others mind. 

Indeed there was truth as they relived their arguments and subsequent meltdown earlier in the day. They each saw the frustration of the other, the need to protect each other, the fear of what was happening to the Doctor. He desperately wanted her and their child safe and she desperately wanted to be there to protect him. They had lashed out with love and had cut each other to their bond, it needed fixing and in accord they started to mend the tatters which had appeared. They did not get far.

A blast of light and heat turned into a turbulent maelstrom; gusts of winds, thunder, and lightning in sickly shades of reds and oranges. They quickly grabbed onto each other in panic as they were buffeted winds which cut through their souls. Then they saw an extraordinary scene being played out in the storm. Two ethereal beings circled each other warily; the golden image of a wolf and the angry form of a being in Time Lord robes and neck cowl. The Time Lord was a dark faceless shadow, the only features being two angry golden eyes; its robes flowed and snapped with angry movements. The wolf was a luminous being of silver and gold whose ruff was bristled with anger. They danced in an agitated semi-circle; when the Lord tried to advance, the wolf lunged forward snapping its jaw. The cloaked figure pulled back and raged. The wolf backed off as well and growled, teeth bared. They repeated their cat and mouse routine several times, each becoming more full of rage and power. The Time Lord raised its hands upwards and lightning bolts cracked down at the wolf. She, and both knew that, nimbly jumped away from the electrical attack. 

"Bloody Hell! What is going on?!" The Doctor had to shout to be heard above the noise of the maelstrom. 

"Dunno!" Rose cried back. She was transfixed by the battle of will's being played out before them. In her mind she sensed the wolf was being protective of her and the Doctor. 

The image of the Time Lord shrieked in anger and frustration as it raised its hands and lunged forwards again. The wolf stood on its hind legs to snap and lash out at its enemy. The shadow Lord pressed its advantage. The wolf circled away before turning and launching her self towards the throat of her enemy... 

There was an explosion of light and a heavy gate of solid metal slammed down in front of the stunned couple. A gust of hurricane force wind slammed into the pair. They flew out of each others minds and crashed onto the carpeted floor of their bedroom. 

The couple looked at each nervously and then simultaneous blurted out their next thoughts.

"Rose, you can come with me!" 

"Your right, my Doctor I should stay!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to thank my friends who follow my stories. Some are friends on Facebook and your support has been so very welcome!

**Author's Note:**

> However will they resolve the tension between them?


End file.
